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Common fears that keep people in unhappy marriages

Family law attorneys frequently have clients who have stayed in unhappy, unhealthy marriages for too long. Often, people stay out of fear. What kinds of fear keep people in bad marriages?

Fear of change can keep people from taking all kinds of steps they need to take for a better life, including ending a marriage. A key change that people fear if they end their marriage is being alone. However, divorced people often learn to be comfortable without someone always around and even to enjoy being alone. They also realize that they aren't alone, but have friends, family and many other people in their lives.

Many people fear that they'll never find someone else who loves them. They may feel that the person they're with is the best they can do, so maybe they should just accept their flaws, even if they're deeply unhappy in the marriage. Sometimes, people are in emotionally-abusive marriages where they've been berated constantly by their spouse. These people have come to believe that no one else will want them. Again, staying in a marriage because of this belief is giving in to fear.

The fear of what others will say and think is a big one for many people. Even with divorce as common as it is, people often see divorce as failure. People who've grown up in families with long marriages or in religions where divorce is frowned upon and perhaps even forbidden in some corners often opt to stay in unhappy marriages rather than face disapproval from others. However, you should never stay in an unhappy marriage for fear of what others will think. You have to do what's best for you and your children.

That brings us to another reason that people stay in unhappy marriages -- the children. They may fear that divorce will upset them. However, children generally do better having divorced parents who can have a healthy co-parenting relationship than being in a home with parents who are fighting or not speaking.

Financial concerns are another reason some people are afraid to divorce. While divorce is likely to change your financial situation, at least for a time, your Florida family law attorney can work to help you seek a settlement that will help you move on in this new phase of your life.

Source: Dreams Recycled, "The 10 Types of Fear that Keep You in Bad Marriages," accessed April 26, 2018

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